okay im stuck.. and i dont know what to do.. i want to get along with my friends.. and for them to respect me...and choose to hang out with me and not just be a second choice.

okay lets make a list of the possible ways i can do this.
- organise a sleepover [but i wont be allowed, my room is too small.. and im just making excuses]
- share a problem with them so they feel needed?
- pretend to be amused at their idiocracy..

i dont know.. i cant be myself around them i have to try so hard to be involved.. i enjoy myself way more when im hanging out with eoin, aine, rebecca etc.

Gawd, if only i didnt feel so guilty 'ditching' them but its not like they miss me, they probably feel a chill because the shadow behind them disapears.


Lisa: Loves to draw, angry all the time but doesnt show it, mostly. Just wants to be accepted and loved by someone. She can be fun, but in a weird way, and people get bored of her easily. scared of affection. Stubborn as hell. ALways has the hiccups. Loner, lovers her own company most of the time. loves to read. Constantly changing her style. lame

I am GONNA TRY AND MAKE MORE FRIENDS.. i kinda feel lonely in the relationship department... boys like me .. but i never like them back, and it is horrible rejected them, but i want to find someone i like.. so it could be like a goal to get them or something along those lines.


lisa